Entry: It is
below. This is the completed story, I hope you like it! ^^
Gaia Name: +[~ Exit ~]+
Media Used]:
Is this your first entry?: Yes
Referred by: When I opened a shop I
was asked to affiliate so I went to the link out of curiosity
Disclaimer: I
do not own Sabin and Samantha Duvert.
Warnings:
Language, violence, something like character death, nudity (I guess, there’s no
like detailed description, just general), Exit has a weird sense of style, so
she did ¾ by the profiles then just made the rest up, because Exit has a messed
up mind.
Summary: Sabin’s
childhood and basic upbringing until the present. Sort of like a life story
sort of thing.
Word Count:
5169
Song: Shackled
Artist/Band: Vertical
Horizon
Song Sabin Sings: Wind by Akeboshi
Shackled
For so long my life's been sewn up tight
inside your hold
and it leaves me there without a place to call my own
Sitting upright in a single
bed stuffed with straw and bundled with blankets a boy around the age of 13
looked out of his window longingly. He leaned against the headboard and sighed
deeply blowing a stray ebony piece of hair out of his face. Hot breath passed
across his fair skin and the lock of hair went back in place.
He placed his palm against
the section of blanket beside him where his father had been sitting not too
long ago; it was still warm.
For weeks he had been taunted
with a dreamless sleep. He longed to have a dream, to imagine himself as one of
the great warriors or heroes from his father’s stories. No, he just didn’t want
to dream it, he wanted it to happen. To jump on a beast and ride it through
forest and jungles and encounter mythical creatures and—no, the way his life
was going now he was probably destined to pick roots for the rest of his days.
“It’s because I’m stuck here doing
nothing.”
He looked out the window once
more and smiled as an idea crossed his adolescent mind. Who was stopping him
from say, climbing out the window and wandering out into the forest for awhile?
After all the time he spent exploring with his father in there, there was no
way he’d get lost.
Quietly Sabin pushed himself
up from the bed and stepped lightly towards the window opening it an exiting, egger
to see what the forest was like at night, without his parents.
Spotting a familiar trail
Sabin hurried along it swiftly. He stopped for a moment as he heard quiet whisperings,
the exact same whispers he had heard from his dream; when he had still had
them.
Instead of shaking him to the
bone as it would have done any other child, Sabin found himself shaking… with excitement.
Sabin exited the forest with
a new understanding; his mother must have done something to stop his dreams. In
her fear and hate of evil spirits which she must have done something to make
them stop, thinking that they were contacting him through his dreams. What
could she have used, it had to be something like a power, or a charm or roots.
Sure enough when he reached
his bedroom underneath the window were brown herbal smelling roots nailed to
the wood of the house.
Sabin ripped them off and
threw them into a bush nearby. He then climbed through his window and saw
another root hanging by the door, which he hastily ripped off.
He threw himself onto his bed
and landed with a dull ‘thud’. Then he fell asleep with the excitement of the
prospect of a dream.
I know now what shadows can see
there’s no point in running 'less you run with me
it’s half the distance through the open door
Shadows danced around him intricately,
the winds billowed through his hair and he moved without a sound as if he
wasn’t even on solid ground. Sabin awoke disappointed that the dream had ended.
The next night he lay
excitedly in his bed wanted to sleep and go back to his dream world.
Sabin remembered the day
before when he had grabbed the shadow at the base of his lamp. Sweat rolled
down his face as he reached again… and succeeded.
Amazed and excited by this
new power he fell asleep, awaiting the dream world that lay beyond him.
A single shadow lay in front
of him. Confidently concentrating Sabin willed the shadow to move a bit. He was
ecstatic when it moved but he started to perspire when it started twisting into
a shape.
Huge pearly white teeth—more
like fangs to Sabin—appeared and a sly toothy grin was formed as hushed
whispers grew louder and louder and…
“AH!”
Sabin unconsciously let out a
blood curdling scream. His mother was the first to enter the room; she came in
running with a match and herbal roots in hand. She proceeded to burn them and
scatter them around him all while chanting something.
His father came in second
running over to him and tried calming him, rubbing small circles on his back
which was drenched in slick sweat.
“Thelia…?” His father asked questionly.
His mother turned sharply and
gave Sabin a fierce glare.
“The roots… you removed
them!?”
Angrily Thelia replaced the
roots and rounded on Sabin once more.
“Sabin! Never again, do not
remove the roots! Very bad things happen to those that allow themselves to be
contacted by evil sprits!”
His mother and father turned
to leave but then his mother turned back.
“We are replacing the mirror
so there is one on the ground near the door. Be careful, don’t break it. Seven
years bad luck is the last thing you need.”
Before you cut me down
again
let me introduce you to the end
The clammy pale
hand of the old gypsy gripped onto Sabin’s fair and young one. She traced
patterns over it and there was a crease in her forehead; a sign of concentration.
The smell of some sort of perfume was heavy in the air and Sabin found himself
close to choking on it.
Suddenly the old
woman stopped, Sabin pulled his hand back thinking she was done, but she held
firm. Leaning her weight forward and ignoring the obvious creak of her chair.
“Boy.”
Her voice was
smooth and even, not creaky or dry as would be suspected by her old age.
“You soul is vibrant
and filled with hope, admiration and desire. You have a rare gift, my boy. Yes
the gift of the age of shadow…”
Sabin looked at
the gypsy in question as she trailed off and her eyes became clouded by a sheet
of dull grey.
“Um… miss?”
His voice was
quiet and tentative, like an ant trying to talk its way out of being squished.
The woman snapped from her daze and turned sharp green eyes on the boy and
gripped his hand firmly.
“Yes, you have
powers but you are quite foolish. Be wary boy, shadows can shape to fit your
desires, but in the end they are only hollow black and see none other than
their own selfish desires. No matter how much you think you can control a
person, thing or situation keep in mind that, they may not like being
controlled. Take heed, for the fear of it, when you fear something adrenaline
takes over and however foolish your actions may be there will always be an
effect, that is the law of cause and effect. You are warned boy the possibility
of your future being dark is high and the possibly of regret is even higher.”
With that the
woman let go of his hand and leaned back into her seat, which creaked loudly.
Seeing that she was done Sabin nodded and smiled in gratitude then left the
heavily perfumed tent.
“Wow, a gift.”
Sabin said happily before exiting the gypsy camp. A pack of tarot cards he had
bought earlier in his back pocket.
“Stupid boy.” The
old woman sneered before rocky slowly in her creaky chair.
And I feel the cold wind blowing beneath
my wings
it always leads me back to suffering
Sabin rose from
his spot on the living room floor and bid goodnight to his parents.
“Sabin, be wary.
Remember what I told you.”
His mother’s
voice floated through the air, he looked back and nodded. With a well placed
glare from Thelia his father seemed compelled to warn Sabin as well.
Retreating back
to his bedroom he dropped onto his bed fully clothed and rested his head
against his pillow. The heat of July was mild and slightly cool in these parts.
His birthday had
been a while back and he smiled remember the gift his father had given him for
his 18th birthday. It had been a book about mythical creatures which
he had become obsessed with much to his mother’s dislike.
He fell into a
sleep and back into the cycle of the clear dream he had been having for the
past several days. It was just like the one in his book, to see one in real
life would be… he knew how he could do it, or thought he did.
“I can’t pass up
something like this” he whispered
Sabin waiting
until the house was completely quiet, signally that his parents were asleep.
He unhooked the
latch on the window, and slipped through, landing softly on the grass. He then
rushed off into the deep woods, with only his subconscious to guide him.
At some point in
time he had decided to stop and concentrate on his dream, he could see in
clearly in his mind.
He crossed his
fingers and hoped for it to work as he followed the directions. Call out the
beast with the fragrant of blood, and chant your given name twice.
Picking up a rock
Sabin slashed it quickly across his upper arm and winced in pain as trickles of
blood poured out.
“Sabin, Sabin.”
He chanted.
He closed his
eyes and waited for something, anything to happen. He opened his eyes
expectantly and… nothing. Just dying trees and a few bugs here and there.
Then suddenly he
felt drained, like someone had sucked out his energy, and they hadn’t been very
gentle with it. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fell to the
ground, unconscious.
But I will soar until the wind whips me
down
Leaves me beaten on unholy ground again
Sabin opened his
eyes finally and looked around him. It was still dark.
“What... was I
doing? I think I tried to summon a monster or something.”
He looked around
him, expected a werewolf to jump out at him, but nothing happened. He sighed
heavily and lifted himself off the ground, dusting off his backside.
“Guess it didn’t
work.”
He left the woods
and saw a glow from where his house was. Upon closer inspection he saw that the
lights were on and his mother was sitting on the porch pacing back and forth
with her roots clutched in her hand.
He sighed once
more, better now than later on. He walked up to the house and his mother
turned.
Then she let out
a scream and stumbled back clinging to the porch banister. What confused Sabin
was she hadn’t screamed in anger, but in horror.
She scrambled and
picked up a stray garden tool that had been left on the porch. She swung out at
him with it and waved her roots frantically.
“Stay out! Stay
back!!”
Sabin started to
panic, what was she doing? And why was she doing it!? Then something seemed to
flick on inside of him.
While Sabin
remain oblivious to what was happening his mother watched horrified. She backed
up against the door horrified at the ‘monster’ in front of her.
“No… no…”
Sabin finally
came to, and found himself inside of his house, with Thelia’s corpse lying at
his feet. He started to shake and lifted his hands to hug his body, only to
discover they were covered with blood, and clawed.
Thousands of
thoughts flashed through his mind and he shook and backed up. Finally not being
able to take it he clutched his head and screamed, turning to run but stopping
as a mirror in the corner caught his attention.
“That… that’s…”
He shook his head
violently and ran to the mirror, running his finger up and down his face and
through his hair; that was now a shocking white instead of his usual brown. His
eyes were a deep red, like the blood that covered his hands, but lighter. He
reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind his ears that had lengthened. He
started to chew his lip but stopped when he realized it hurt. He opened his
mouth slowly and started shaking violently when he saw that they were all sharp
to the tip.
“…me.”
Sabin hugged his
arms to his body, the blood leaving smears on his shirt and soaking through. He
still had the buzz of possibilities running through his head
“C-calm down,
calm d-down. Stay calm, stay calm. Cul-culitavate you hunger before you idealize…
mo-motivate you’re an-anger… to make the-them all r-realize…”
His voice cracked
as tears spilt from his eyes and ran down his cheeks leaving streaks in the
dirt that already covered them. He let out a small sob but continued singing
the song, the song that his mother had sung when he was smaller to calm his
down after a bad dream or gotten angry.
“Climbing the
m-mountain… never coming down… break I-into the contents, never f-falling
down…”
Gradually the new
features went away, leaving his with the silver hair and longer canines. Still
crying and singing he began to approach his mother.
“My knee is still
shaking… like I was twelve… sn—
He was cut off in
mid-sentence as his father burst trough the door; he took one look and Sabin
then at the corpse of his wife and came to a quick conclusion. He turned
angrily to Sabin who panicked instantly. He quickly looked for a mode of exit
but the door was blocked by his father.
He ran through
the house and into his bedroom, the clunk of his father’s boots making him very
aware he was being pursed. He pulled open the bedroom window and jumped through
it fleeing the place he had lived for probably his whole life.
Sabin was scared,
confused and a little crazed, he couldn’t understand what happened, and like
most humans this scared him; not understanding something that had to do with
you fully. But… was he even human anymore? He asked himself.
After running for
what seemed like forever Sabin entered a deeper part of the woods he had never
seen, far away from his home… or what used to be his home. This time, Sabin
wasn’t as excited about being in a new area for the first time.
He collapses on a
rock; half covered with moss and clutched his head in his hands. Some blood
smudged into his hair from the cuts in his palms, but he didn’t have the heart
to care.
So tired now of paying my dues
I start out strong but then I always lose
Sabin got up and
dragged himself further into the woods to find some sort of shelter. The ground
beneath his was hard and so far he hadn’t seen anything edible. He soon stopped
just outside of a cave; it had vines around it that were all a dark brownish
color.
The sky had
turned dark and Sabin could feel his hand throbbing, it was probably infected
of something. He clambered into the cave and looked around. It wasn’t wet which
was good, no wetness meant he wouldn’t catch a cold from it. It was also July
so it was pretty warm.
He then got out
of the cave to gather fire wood, and two rocks. He hoped to find some sort of
liquid he could drink and something to eat.
Hours later Sabin
came stumbling back into the cave, with no food or water, but two sharp rocks,
a few stones and some twigs that found hardly be considered as firewood.
The next day
Sabin attempted to travel to another city, somewhere where he could be clothed
and fed. He had stopped after walking a whole day from exhaustion and
dehydration.
Sabin stayed in
that one area for 3 months, living as a scavenger. After awhile he found a
stream and he stayed near in during those grueling months, making fires and
cooking fish on them.
Everyday Sabin
build up a wall around himself, everyday is got higher and more closed in. He
did this tilt the point of feeling claustrophobic. This wall was of course all
in his mind, but as long as the wall was there he could keep himself separate
from it.
Sabin lay near
the stream on a patch of browning grass, his eyes wide open, just… thinking.
“I need… to get
out of here.”
He murmured it
quietly to himself, and watched as a deer drank from the stream. He slowly
picked up a sharp stone and waited. He crouched and slowly went towards the
deer, the stone held tight in his palm. He got up right behind the deer and…
It's half the distance before you leave me
behind
It's such a waste of time
Sabin counted the
money he had just gotten and headed off in search of a clothing store. The
walked into the closest one and went in looking at all the different types of
clothes.
After deciding
that it was probably gaining power
from his isolation Sabin traveled to the nearest town.
He changed into
his new attire and walked out from the store, a brownish notebook stuck under
his arm. A journal was just what he needed, a way to collect his thoughts and
put them out in a way he could understand clearly.
Sabin set off
again through the down, a dirt path intent on finding more about this thing
inside of him. Even after all of this Sabin’s childhood curiosity and obsession
still remained and he was set on knowing about this.
This, he told
himself, was what he had always wanted, he hadn’t only gotten to see the
monster from his dreams he had become it. He had done what he had wanted to do
and so much more. Somehow this kept Sabin going, it kept him walking down that
dirt road, a path that had no clear ending.
Hints were everywhere,
but not always evident or easy to access. Sabin spent a great deal of time, no,
all his time searching for hints and leads about the thing inside him.
He started to
travel over
Sabin entered a
dirty bar, and ducked as a beer bottle came hurtling at his face. Two sweaty
men were jumping on top of each other wrestling as the others cheered on their
favourite fighter. Sabin avoided them the best he could and sat down on a bar
stool. It made an odd sound when he sat, but he ignored it and turned to the
bar tender.
He started to
chat, he had heard rumors about funny things that happened here and hoped it
might give him a clue as to the thing inside him.
“So, what are you
doing ‘round these parts?” The bartender had sort of an accent and seemed
anger; probably because Sabin hadn’t ordered a drink yet.
“Oh, I’m a
traveling academic collecting local stories and fables ‘for a collection of
works and inspiration’”
The bartender’s
lips curled into a deep frown and he grunted turning to clean a glass. Sabin took this as an opportunity to ask
about the occurrence.
“I heard something
weird happened around him a few days ago, can you tell me about it?”
The bartender
grunted again and set the glass down hard, causing the bar to shake a little.
“I dun like
answering questions, alright. I gotta go serve me customers, you understand,
don’t cha?”
Sabin nodded and
watched the bartender go off to serve his other customers, the passed out guy
and the possibly dead guy.
“Hoi! You, over
there!”
Sabin tuned and
saw a few guys around a poker table, all of them had smiles on their faces and
one guy waved him over.
Sabin looked
around then got off the odd sounding stool and walked over to the guys.
“We’re playing a
game of poker here, you see, but our buddy passed out, you wouldn’t mind
filling in for him would ya?”
The guy had a
long red beard and he smiled widely. He pointed to the guy that was possibly
dead indicated that, that was their friend.
“I don’t know how
to play.” He said simply.
If anything their
smiles seemed to widen.
“s’okay, we’ll
teach cha, won’t we boys?”
The ‘boys’ nodded
in agreement and Sabin being the gullible guy he was took them for genuine ones
and joined in their play. The gamers were nice and friendly as they taught him
and he got used to it, he even won a few gamers, or more precisely they let him
win a few gamers. They soon started to get serious and to put it simply; they
milked him for all he was worth.
Sabin started to
worry, sure he had just sold some wolf pelts and gotten new clothes but if it
went on like this he wouldn’t even have that. It was winter months now, being
out in the woods too long would make him sick, he had already worked his ass
off to get some money in the first place; he couldn’t just go out and do it
again as easily.
Worrying, worry
was a trigger, something that made his wall tumble and released the beast held
within. He was losing control. Sabin’s body suddenly became numb and he got
rigid in his seat.
“What is it boy?
Shocked stiff from losing?”
The guys laughed
and banged on the table with their fist, clutching their stomachs as tears of
mirth streamed down their faces.
Sabin’s ears
lengthened tearing the original flesh and letting the new lengthened pieces
take their place. His gums pulsed as they grew teeth rapidly. The lights
suddenly dimmed then shut off entirely, by this time the ‘boys’ were freaking
out.
The leader
scrambled but tumbled over Sabin then struggled to get up.
“Sorry kid, you
alright? Forget it I gotta get gotta here… hey kid?”
Sabin’s eyes
opened slowly and all you could see in the tavern was his flashing red eyes,
and all you could hear was the screams of the inhabitants of the bar.
When Sabin came
too it was a mess, bar inhabitants lying all over the place, some weren’t even
in one piece. So Sabin did what he could and fled, as the villagers came into
the tavern.
One of the bar
inhabitants lived long enough to say what had attacked them, or what he thought
attacked them.
And so the rumors
of the werewolf with white hair were born.
'Cause my shackles
you won't be
and my rapture
you won't believe
and deep inside you will bleed for me
Sabin had shoved
that last incident into the back of his mind and tried to focus on other
things, he tried to concentrate on his income and figuring out what was in him.
Several months
passed and Sabin found himself several miles out of
“Hey, sweetie.”
Sabin turned and
saw a woman wearing things that could barley be considered as clothing. He
skirt looked more like underwear and the same could be said for her top. The
only thing that seemed to cover skin was the fishnet that covered her arms and
most of her legs.
Normally he would
have said hi, then turned them down when they asked whether he wanted a good
time, or wanted them to take his mind off his problems.
“Hey, sweetie how
about you come with me? You look pretty down, I could take your mind of all
your problems, for a small fee of course.”
This, Sabin
thought is where I say ‘no, thanks’ and go about my business. The ale however
had made him forget reasoning and she did she could take his mind off his
problems.
“Yah, sure.”
So Sabin found
himself following the prostitute to a room above the tavern. She led him
through then closed the door and locked it with a silver key.
He was a little
surprised when the prostitute, Annette she had said started to strip. In his
drunken haze Sabin hadn’t really thought about how to do it, sure he knew about t but…
“Don’t worry
sweetie, just leave everything to me. But first, I’ll need your fee paid.”
She held out her
hand and Sabin dropped the bills before sitting on the dusty bed that creaked
under his break.
“Lay back
sweetie, you’re in for a ride.”
She giggled and
she tucked the bills away in her coat, and approached herself draping himself
over him. Then Sabin was suddenly overwhelmed by a sudden rush of pleasure that
came over and over again, and then the wall collapsed again.
When the thing
inside him was ready took control the new and foreign emotion scared it, so it
lashed out at the source, and that was the end of Annette.
Sabin came too
and was once again met with a bloody corpse. The effects of the alcohol had
left him and he was left with the complete feeling of disgust and fright.
Something that
was supposed to be an important and wonderful experience was crushed and
tainted. So Sabin did one of the tings he become so accustomed to doing, he
fled, fled from a city he felt he could never return to.
So here I slave inside of a broken dream
forever holding on to splitting seams
Sabin sat down on
the ground in the dingy inn and put his head in his hands. What was inside of
him… it wasn’t ever going to leave, was it?
“Things that I
would be doing if this never happened, being with my family and maybe a wife
and a few kids. Stuff like that might never happen, ever. It’s almost been a
year, I’ve been like this for almost a year. Why can’t I just go on and accept
it?”
Sabin pulled at
his hair, which had lengthened considerably and now had to be held back in a
low ponytail.
Sabin had been
sticking to small cities for awhile now, so he found himself in another small
town in a dirty inn.
“I can’t I can’t
accept it because accepting it would be accepting all the people it’s murdered,
I can’t do that. I’m starting to feel like we’re sharing a mind, like every
time I lose control the bond gets stronger… maybe, maybe not.”
Sabin let out a
small frustrated scream and sprawled out on the wood ground. He lay there for
awhile, thinking about the thing inside him, an anju, was what it was called.
He had learned it somewhere, but he couldn’t remember anymore.
“I… don’t need to
accept it, I just need to make an agreement and deal with it, that’s all.”
So take your peace and leave me alone to
die
I don't need you to keep my faith alive
Later on Sabin
came to
He sat down on
the stool and didn’t notice the young woman beside him until she actually
talked to him, by then he was on his 3rd mug of ale, whether he was
drowning sorrows of celebrating, Sabin didn’t know anymore.
“Are you a
foreigner?” he voice was quiet and shy.
She had brownish-auburn
colored hair and her eyes were a calm green. Sabin nodded and found he couldn’t
stop looking at her, a weird thought passed through his mind which he blamed on
the anju, it was childish but he failed to care.
“Really? Um...
are you visiting family?”
Sabin flinched
visibly and the woman laid a hand tenderly on his arm.
“I’m sorry, you
must just be traveling then.”
Once more Sabin
nodded his head, and even though he thought he should look away he still
couldn’t keep his eyes off her.
“What… are you
doing in a tavern?” Sabin asked finally, his voice had gotten deeper since he
left home.
She looked taken
aback, but then smiled calmly.
“I just decided
to leave my fiancée who only wanted to be with me because of a dowry. I feel as
if I’ve been cheated, like I-- . Sorry I must be annoying you.”
Sabin shook his
head.
“You...look sort
of like you’re lost. If you’re lost the best thing is to retrace your steps
from the very beginning and start all over again.”
She looked at him
seriously, and he nodded again, getting up from the bar stool.
I know now what trouble can be
And why it follows me so easily
It's half the distance through the open door
Before you shut me down
Again
Let me introduce you to the end
“Retrace my
steps… what’s your name?”
She smiled again.
“Samantha.”
He nodded.
“Samantha, I’m
gonna go somewhere, do you want to come?”
Samantha shook
her head, declining the offer.
“No, I won’t come
but, I’ll be waiting when you come back.”
Sabin nodded one
final time and exited the tavern. Heading to the place where it all began, in
order to start all over again.
'Cause my shackles
you won't be
and my rapture
you won't believe
and deep inside you will bleed for me
Sabin stood
outside of the place he once called his home, and walked inside. It had turned
into a rickety old shack and looked abandoned.
Sabin laid his
hand against the place where his mother had breathed her final breath. He
understood now, everything that happened was for a reason. All this happened
and now he felt he had a stronger sense of control. He could never truly accept
the monster inside of him, but he could thank it, because without it he would
have never realized his true self and potential.
And my laughter
you won't hear
the faster
I disappear
A single tear
slipped down his face.
And time will burn your eyes to tears